june 2025, protests everywhere

I felt deeply triggered when I started to write this letter. There were protests in LA, there were protests everywhere. It's not that I don't think protesting is important or effective; it's that protesting reminds me of 2020, and actually, it's less the act of protesting and more the buildup and conversation around whatever protest is upcoming. To put it simply, white people are mad, and when white people are mad, I am triggered.

My disclaimer, in case you missed it: I'm Black! I am Black and whit,e so yes, I am also white, but when I say "white people," I mean fully white people who don't have Black parents or any biologically Black family.

When white people get mad about the things I've always been mad about, discourse is born. White people were so mad when the NYPD murdered George Floyd in May 2020. They were so mad, not because a cop killed a Black person, which happens all the fucking time, but because their country had been exposed as the flop that it was and is. Donald Trump was the President (for the first time), which is humiliating, and we were in the thick of a global pandemic and weren't really supposed to be leaving the house. So white people were already mad, and then George Floyd was killed, and the video of his murder was everywhere, and no one had anything to do but be online, so it went "viral," a word that doesn't do it justice. There was so much hope; I could bite it. White people were sending Black people money, signing up for their creative endeavors, backing their projects, uplifting their voices, and quieting their own. I personally saw the most lucrative summer for this bookletter in 2020 because everyone was sharing it, tagging me, and encouraging their white friends to learn from a Black person.

And then it all went away. Vaccines were given, and we had a new thing for white people to be mad about, and George Floyd was left behind, and every white woman who had seen herself in Breonna Taylor went to the beach. It felt, and feels, humiliating thinking back to the taste in my mouth, the hope for public health and housing, for Black people to be uplifted and celebrated, for reparations, for cops to stop getting away with what they're paid to get away with. It felt like things would change, and then they didn't.

So I'm triggered when there are big protests. White people were really mad about Trump, who is the American President again at the time of this bookletter, having a birthday party on Flag Day. They called it "no kings," a message that doesn't resonate with me, but one that I am happy to support if it means people are learning to use their anger and to bring it to the streets.

I just wish I thought it meant anything or would do anything. I wish white people still thought about George Floyd.

Here's what I read while I was not protesting in June.

[books I read]

Rejection by Tony Tulathimutte (2024) | Quick summary: A series of connected stories merged together between personal crises, deep humiliation, sex, dating, and being online.
This is one of the wildest books I've read, at least in a long time. It felt like reading someone's diary, unhinged tweets, and juicy reddit threads all at once. It got stranger and stranger, and I regretted recommending it to a friend after reading only half of it, but hopefully, if she reads it, she doesn't think I am insane for the rec. The book falls off a little for me when it gets a bit meta but I fucking love when a writer decides to just get as weird as possible and write sentences you couldn't have possibly dreamed up. A fun, weird, bonkers read that probably won't hit the same if you haven't spent...quite a bit of time online.
[literary fiction, satire, written by a thai-american writer, medium-length read]

The Temple of My Familiar by Alice Walker (1989) | Quick summary: The intertwining stories of characters from The Color Purple who explore gender, sexual hierarchy, and the Black experience through conversations and daily life.
If you follow my bookletter closely, you'll know I'm going through an Alice Walker phase in my life. Partially because I like Walker and have always wanted to read more of her work and partially because I've gotten into the (bad?) habit of buying any "old" or vintage-y looking book written by Black people, especially Black women like Toni Morrison, Zora Neale Hurston, Audre Lorde, bell hooks, and Walker. This was good, though it didn't grab me as much as Possessing the Secret of Joy, which I read in April, but I really enjoyed how much of Walker's storytelling is just long, meandering conversations. She writes like we should all be able to speak; fully, in no rush, with a strong audience, no matter the mundanity of the details. This book is technically part 2/3 in The Color Purple series so I've now read #3, #2, and I guess I should finish the trilogy with a re-read.
[contemporary fiction, written by a Black american novelist, short story writer, poet, and social activist, longer read]

The List by Yomi Adegoke (2023) | Quick summary: An anonymous list of abusive men in media shakes up Ola and Michael's relationship, because his name is on it.
This happened in real life when Twitter was still good and blue checkmark media personalities were the kings of it. I was never in in those circles but I was right outside of them, holding onto the ice rink edges. Most of you know I wrote for HelloGiggles for years and though HelloGiggles never had the prestige that some of the other online pubs did, it created a mutual out of me. But when the "shitty media men list" was created in 2017, I had access to it. I was "in" enough to have access to this huge list of men and all of their absolute worst workplace behaviors, most which were sexually depraved in nature. I looked for the one or two men I personally knew and was releived when they weren't on it. And after that, I mostly remember a lot of thinkpieces and backlash because after all, isn't putting a bunch of people on a list...bad? I don't have a strong take other than nothing is more exciting than something like a shitty media men list being released online. This book was fine, by the way.
[literary fiction, suspense, written by a Black british journalist and author, medium-length read]

[books I heard]

There Was a Little Girl: The Real Story of My Mother and Me by Brooke Shields (2014) | Quick summary: A detailed memoir about actress Brooke Shields's relationship with her late mother.
I think I've said this before, but there are celebrity memoirs and there are memoirs written by people who happen to be celebrities. Brooke Shields's memoir about her mother is a Memoir before it's a Celebrity Memoir. Shields explores her relationship with her mother from a very honest and vulnerable place. Her mom, who passed away in 2012, was the main subject of Shields's book, There Was a Little Girl, published only three years after her passing. It's clear to me that she was still processing, still mad, still defensive, of her mother's behavior. Though Shields doesn't say this explicitly, she leaves the impression that the press didn't report on or digest Teri Shields very well. I firmly believe that people have a natural inclination to defend their mothers, regardless of the relationship, and this book comes across as Shields' defense of hers. Which, I understand and don't begrudge her in the slightest. That said, it's clear that Shields was tortured by her mother's drinking, which greatly affected her life to the point of near obsession. Every move Shields made growing up and even into her adult life was about her mom's drinking, which is how children of addicts have to act to survive. I loved this book. I also love Brooke Shields, even though I don't really have a reason other than her two-episode stint on *Friends.* Anyway, I'll listen to her other books now, too. She's a good writer and a great narrator!
[nonfiction, celebrity memoir, mom wound, children of alcoholics, written by a white american actress, model, author, and podcast host, longer listen, read by the author]

Everything You Ever Wanted: A Memoir by Jillian Lauren (2015) | Quick summary: The story of Jillian Lauren and her husband, Scott Shriner of Weezer, adopting their son.
I'm assuming this book was on my radar because it's about adoption, but I didn't realize going into it that Jillian Lauren is low-key famous. As the wife of someone in Weezer, a very famous band, Lauren runs in different circles than your average white adoptive mother raising a child adopted from Ethiopia. Lauren is a fascinating person, and this isn't her first book, and yes, I will be reading her others about being an international concubine in some prince's harem!! Anyway, I googled Lauren to see how things are going ten years after this book came out, and as of this month, she's involved in a court case over being shot by a cop?? Idk I'm probably on her side.
[nonfiction, memoir, adoption, written by a white american writer, performer, adoption advocate, and former call girl, medium-length listen, read by the author]

The Ungrateful Refugee: What Immigrants Never Tell You by Dina Nayeri (2019) | Quick summary: A woman's story about fleeing Iran along with her mother and brother, settling in the states, and eventually attending Princeton.
This was a great memoir-ish that almost felt like a multimedia collection. Nayeri weaves together her personal story with the stories of other asylum seekers and refugees, so you get a lot of different perspectives, backgrounds, and stories, all tied together by immigration. I loved listening to it, because it's read by the author, and her voice is gorgeous, but I bet it's a fantastic read.
[nonfiction, memoir, immigration studies, written by an iranian-american novelist, essayist, memoirist, and short story writer, medium-length listen, read by the author]

Freedom Is a Constant Struggle: Ferguson, Palestine, and the Foundations of a Movement by Angela Davis (2016) | Quick summary: A collection of speeches, essays, interviews, and conversations from Angela Davis on Palestine, Ferguson, incarceration, and other civil rights issues.
I could listen to Angela Davis read every single written word on this earth, especially her own. This book is a collection of speeches and interviews, and it reads that way, so it both works and doesn't quite work as an audiobook. When Davis is reading a speech, it works perfectly because her literal voice is so necessary, so special, such a gift, but when she's reading an interview, she's also reading the interviewer's questions, which is just a little hard to follow. That said, Davis is one of the best people to have graced this stupid civilization. She's a personal hero of mine, and one I'm lucky to have studied for years and even had the opportunity to hear speak irl. This collection, although nearly a decade old, remains relevant and will continue to be so, especially in the fight for Palestine's freedom.
[nonfiction collection, civil rights and liberties, Black history, written by a Black political activist, scholar, author, and speaker, shorter listen, read by the author]

Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin): A Memoir by Sly Stone (2023) | Quick summary: The memoir of legend and trailblazer Sly Stone, of Sly and the Family Stone.
God, this book was good. I was inspired to see if Stone had a memoir out after his passing a few weeks ago and not only does he, but it's a great memoir! I was delighted to hear him talk about Vallejo, California and Solano County, where my dad and his family were raised, just like the Stones. The momoir is read primarily by Dion Graham (who I enjoy, he read both Desmond books), it feels like Stone the whole time. His voice through the writing and narration is strong and interesting. I wasn't sure how it would grab me but from the get-go, I was in. A great memoir for a great man, may he rest in peace.
[nonfiction, celebrity memoir, Black music history, written by ben greeman and sly stone, read by sly stone and dion graham]

[reading challenges]

• For Seattle Summer Book Bingo:
  • There Was a Little Girl by Brooke Shields: "Grief."
  • Rejection by Tulathimutte: "Suggested by an Independent Bookseller."
  • The List by Yomi Adegoke: "Dystopia."

[books I recommend]

Hilariously and accidentally, I left this section blank last month. That's not because I didn't recommend any books, but because I fully forgot. This month, I'll recommend!

• If you were on Twitter in the good days: The List and Rejection
• If you are the child of an alcoholic: There Was a Little Girl
• If you are a person, especially an American: Freedom Is a Constant Struggle

As always, thank you for reading and thank you for subscribing and thank you for sharing! If you know people who can afford to pay for consistent, funny, and informative bookletters, definitely share with them! I'm a grad student with a part-time job and little funds so this bookletter helps me pay my phone bill!

Love you, see you in July.