january 2026, ICE out
I was reading something out loud at work and accidentally said “January 40th,” which is how January always feels. Longer than it actually is, and always slightly disappointing.
When I think about January 2026, I think about ICE. I think about how devastating it is to live in a world whose values don’t align with my own. It sucks that, collectively, we haven’t held white people accountable for anything, and so we’ve ended up here. Or rather, we’re still here.
Our modern-day policing can be traced back to slave patrolling days in the early 1700s. These cops were tasked with creating a system of fear while squashing slave uprisings. These people were granted the legal right to chase, assault, apprehend, and execute Black people, if they didn’t return them to their white slaveowners.
When I think of cops today, I see a direct continuation of this legacy. To me, nothing has changed in policing. Cops are still given full authority to uphold a system of fear while beating, raping, and killing American citizens, most often Black and brown American citizens.
And when I think of ICE, I think of cops, which means when I think of ICE, I think of Black people being killed for wanting the right to exist as a full person and not a white person’s slave. When I think of ICE, I think of all of the conversations I’ve been having, and communities have been having about how to protect ourselves. I think of the University of Washington telling us that ICE isn’t allowed inside our classrooms, knowing that ICE and the cops will always do exactly what they want to do. And they will always get away with it.
The systems we have in place are foundational and strategic.
I know it upsets people, even my best and closest friends sometimes, but I don’t see a lot of difference between the president we have in office and almost every other american president. This current one is just a lot more open about upholding the systems our country was built on. I have strong feelings about ICE and the police, and I feel equally strongly about those who support these institutions.
Here’s what I read in January.
[books i read]
Healer's Touch by Samantha Devereaux (2026) | Quick summary: Anya is taken by Zarek to heal the crown prince, because she's the only one who can.
I'm so nervous writing about this because I read this book as an early reader and don't want to say too much or too little. I really, really liked reading this book, though. Devereaux has created a fascinating world with characters who are impossible not to have a huge crush on. I left giddy, feeling very committed to Anya and Zarek, and remembered how much I love reading fiction. This book will be out next month, and I will for sure hype it up so y'all remember to buy it, check it out, download it to your Kindles, whatever. You can also keep up by subscribing to Devereaux Diaries! Healer's Touch is so good, and I already desperately want to read the sequel.
[fiction, fantasy, romance, written by a Black author and sensitivity reader, medium-length read]
I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Se-hee (2018) | Quick summary: A memoir built of conversations between the author and her therapist.
Tragically, Se-hee died in October 2025, and though this book had been on my TBR for a number of years, I bumped it up to read it and honor her life. It made me sad, reading it after she died. I also understand a lot of what she shares in this book. I am not suicidal (even though Instagram told me to reach out if I need help after posting about this book), but I am a deeply melancholy person. And I understand her. I read that Se-hee donated her heart, lungs, liver, and kidneys, helping to save five lives. May she rest in peace.
[nonfiction, memoir, psychology, written by a south korean author, translated by a korean writer and translator, shorter read]
Illegal by Eoin Colfer and Andrew Donkin (2017) | Quick summary: A graphic novel highlighting the plight of undocumented immigrants.
I love graphic novels and find them very moving. This one is about Ebo, who believes his brother Kwame has set off on the same dangerous journey from Ghana to Europe, following in his sister's footsteps. Ebo refuses to stay in Ghana without his brother and embarks on a mission to find a better life. But now that I'm writing this, I'm realizing all three contributors to creating this book are white people, which gives me the ick!
[fiction, graphic novel, written by a white irish children's literature writer and a white children's author, illustrated by a white italian artist, shorter read]
Mood Swings by Frankie Barnet (2024) | Quick summary: In a post-apocalyptic world, the animals have turned on the people, until a billionaire invents a way to kill all of them at once, making the world a safer, but worse place.
I wanted to read another captivating fiction book after finishing Healer's Touch, so I went to the library and rummaged through my TBR and left with this, the following book I talk about, and a few other random things. What a fun cover Mood Swings has, and what a crazy book. I think I'm finally comfortable reading pandemic-y books, and this one was certainly that. The animals are sick of our shit, so they start killing humans, and no one can leave their house. Then an Elon-Musk-type kills all of the animals and starts to focus his energy on building a time machine. All of the rich, white people in power are thrilled about the time machine and want to go back to the Industrial Revolution to introduce the tools we have now. I liked this book, didn't love it, but if I told you how many times I've thought about someone like fucking Elon Musk building a time machine, you'd worry about me. It doesn't feel impossible!!!
[fiction, dystopian, written by a white canadian fiction author, medium-length read]
Leave the World Behind by Rumaan Alam (2020) | Quick summary: A family's vacation is interrupted by the owners of the house they're staying in, as there is a mysterious power outage all around them.
There was sooooooOooooOooooo much buildup in this book for nothing to really happen! I don't understand what was going on (a big power outage??), and it ended so unsatisfactorily. Also, these people drank SO much alcohol, which is usually fine with me, but felt weird for the amount of time they were together. It's all I could focus on. The timelines just don't make sense, and I didn't like this book! It's apparently a movie on Netflix too, but I shan't be watching. (I don't even have Netflix since I rage-cancelled it a few months ago.)
[fiction, thriller, written by a bangladeshi american writer, medium-length read]
[books i heard]
Gwyneth: The Biography by Amy Odell (2025) | Quick summary: A comprehensive biography of actress Gwyneth Paltrow.
This fucking rocked. Gwyneth Paltrow is such an interesting person because she's rich, famous, and beautiful but also so...is vapid too mean of a word? Notably, Amy Odell spoke with many people who know and have worked with Paltrow, but Paltrow herself tends to avoid these kinds of journalistic investigations into her life, which is fair enough, but is a bit telling.
[nonfiction, biography, written by a white american author and journalist, read by chanté mccormick, long listen]
Anna: The Biography by Amy Odell (2022) | Quick summary: A comprehensive biography about fashion editor Anna Wintour.
So I thought Amy Odell was such a great biographer that I decided to listen to her book about Anna Wintour, who I don't really give a shit about, but was a little interested in after finishing André Leon Talley's memoir in December. Wintour is interesting too! And racist. Like, a lot.
[nonfiction, biography, written by a white american author and journalist, read by imogen church, long listen]
Why Fish Don't Exist: A Story of Loss, Love, and the Hidden Order of Life by Lulu Miller (2020) | Quick summary: The story of scientist David Starr Jordan interwoven with the author's personal story, and lots of talk about fish.
David Starr Jordan had a mission to discover as many of the world's fish as he could, and he did. Over the course of decades, Jordan built one of the most important specimen collections in history, but during the 1906 earthquake in San Francisco, he lost over a thousand of his fish. His life's work was literally shattered. Miller weaves her own stories with Jordan's, ultimately pondering how any of us go on after losing everything.
[nonfiction, biography, memoir, written by a white american scientist, journalist, and author, read by the author, longish listen]
[books I recommend]
- If you're a romantasy person or have been interested in becoming one and need a book written by an actually talented author: Healer's Touch
- If you're depressed, or a therapist, or both: I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki
- If you like mess: Mood Swings, Gwyneth, and Anna
I mentioned last month, but my goal this year is to get all of my debt down before I earn my MSW. That became more challenging in the last month because the University of Washington stole my $2,600 stipend. The world is on fire but it is Black History Month and you should subscribe to the paid version! Or get a friend to subscribe! Support me! (If you already subscribe, thank you so fucking much.)
Clearly, I'm bad at making money because I've pissed off a lot of people this year and lost subscribers over my political takes, but whatever! We're out here trying!
Don't forget to read Black this month and every month! Love you bye.
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